As Christians, we are called to live different lifestyles than the rest of the world. The New Testament says in multiple places how we are to put off the old self and put on the new self in Christ. Christians ask this question so often: "Who am I in Christ?". Very often we discuss it on the surface so much that it becomes a "John 3:16" topic. That is, we talk about being transformed so much that we forget what that truly means and entails.
For the past few weeks in DTS, God has been working in me a lot about this topic. I have realized that all people have some sort of pride, some sort of identity that they make for themselves. Three weeks ago I discovered that I definitely struggled with this. During class I was challenged to find areas in my life that I needed to hand over to God so that they would no longer tempt me to walk "in my old ways". I realized that I had this strange problem of being prideful in myself and my talents, yet at the same time I had no confidence to do the things that the Holy Spirit was challenging me to do. I justified this by telling myself that God made me to be a shy girl that was better at being like the rest of the crowd. I decided then and there in class that I must burn these things so that I would no longer justify my selfish actions and identity.
Then two weeks ago our classes were about what exactly it means to have our identity in Christ. We talked about a lot of things that made me realize that I had a lot to hand over to God. Even at that point I didn't quite know what sort of skeletons I was digging out of the closet. One of the specific things we talked about was the importance of humility. It was no mistake that God challenged me one day to get rid of my pride and the next day He would teach me what it means to be humble. I realized at that point that my attitude about myself had been completely wrong in the past. God made me a humble servant of His, yet He also gave me a bold, adventurous, and confident personality that is willing to be courageous when the Holy Spirit challenges me.
Once I was willing to define myself with these qualities, God decided to take me to the next level. This past week, my DTS classes have been about being TRANSFORMED in Christ, and what it looks like to live our lives according to our new identity in Him. This is when all of my preconceived and instilled notions about myself came crashing to the ground. I realized that all along I knew that God made me to be these things in Him. I am His child. I am unique. I am bold. I am confident. I am humble. I haven't given myself these qualities; He has given these to me among many other things because He made me in His image. I've also realized that for so long that I have been called unique or different in a negative way that I had begun to think that my identity in Christ was a bad thing. So I decided to put different qualities on myself. I thought I was the same as everyone else. I thought I was shy. I thought I was talented by my own strength. And by doing all of these things, I started to build walls around myself, and these walls were beginning to immobilize me.
Through multiple classes, and multiple people speaking the truth about myself back into my life for the past few weeks, I decided that I needed to be transformed in Christ again. I HAVE DECIDED TO RISE UP TO WHO HE MADE ME TO BE. HE HAS REDEEMED ME AND GIVEN ME A NEW NAME. This new name is Mfula, which means river in Siswati, the language that my community speaks. This bible passage is where that name comes from:
For the past few weeks in DTS, God has been working in me a lot about this topic. I have realized that all people have some sort of pride, some sort of identity that they make for themselves. Three weeks ago I discovered that I definitely struggled with this. During class I was challenged to find areas in my life that I needed to hand over to God so that they would no longer tempt me to walk "in my old ways". I realized that I had this strange problem of being prideful in myself and my talents, yet at the same time I had no confidence to do the things that the Holy Spirit was challenging me to do. I justified this by telling myself that God made me to be a shy girl that was better at being like the rest of the crowd. I decided then and there in class that I must burn these things so that I would no longer justify my selfish actions and identity.
Then two weeks ago our classes were about what exactly it means to have our identity in Christ. We talked about a lot of things that made me realize that I had a lot to hand over to God. Even at that point I didn't quite know what sort of skeletons I was digging out of the closet. One of the specific things we talked about was the importance of humility. It was no mistake that God challenged me one day to get rid of my pride and the next day He would teach me what it means to be humble. I realized at that point that my attitude about myself had been completely wrong in the past. God made me a humble servant of His, yet He also gave me a bold, adventurous, and confident personality that is willing to be courageous when the Holy Spirit challenges me.
Once I was willing to define myself with these qualities, God decided to take me to the next level. This past week, my DTS classes have been about being TRANSFORMED in Christ, and what it looks like to live our lives according to our new identity in Him. This is when all of my preconceived and instilled notions about myself came crashing to the ground. I realized that all along I knew that God made me to be these things in Him. I am His child. I am unique. I am bold. I am confident. I am humble. I haven't given myself these qualities; He has given these to me among many other things because He made me in His image. I've also realized that for so long that I have been called unique or different in a negative way that I had begun to think that my identity in Christ was a bad thing. So I decided to put different qualities on myself. I thought I was the same as everyone else. I thought I was shy. I thought I was talented by my own strength. And by doing all of these things, I started to build walls around myself, and these walls were beginning to immobilize me.
Through multiple classes, and multiple people speaking the truth about myself back into my life for the past few weeks, I decided that I needed to be transformed in Christ again. I HAVE DECIDED TO RISE UP TO WHO HE MADE ME TO BE. HE HAS REDEEMED ME AND GIVEN ME A NEW NAME. This new name is Mfula, which means river in Siswati, the language that my community speaks. This bible passage is where that name comes from:
"There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at the break of day."
-Psalms 46:4-5
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at the break of day."
-Psalms 46:4-5
God led me to this passage in June of this year, and for some reason I felt like He was speaking directly about me when I read these verses. I loved the verses, but I had no idea how deeply meaningful these were to become to me while I was doing DTS in South Africa. God has named me Mfula because He has made me to be a peaceful and beautiful person, yet at the same time so powerful. This is exactly what rivers are. They are peaceful, yet have the power to wear away mountains of stone into sand. I am a power which brings peace, but this is only because God is within me. By myself I would be nothing. But because I am His, I am something. He has made me new. And if I am willing to be made new and stay close to Him, He will keep showing me ways to be transformed and renewed for the better. Not only does He do this for just me, but He does this for each one of us. Please take time to go through this process that I did. It will be hard to identify what you have been living by falsely, yet it will be worth the transformation. Trust me, it is truly life-changing.
A fun little side-note: the kids in the community and in the after-school program like the name Mfula way better than Phoebe. My 0-4 year-olds got pretty excited in the after-school program when I told them they could call me a river.